Good question and advice that the King and Elton John could perhaps do with, since they have 33 and 10 godchildren respectively.
Listen up, Your Majesties.
To be clear, it is of course an immense honour to be asked to be a godparent to any child. This means a friend trusts you enough to shepherd their little darling through its early life. Me? Really? The person who’s still a bit nervy about handling babies and lets their head loll around like a water balloon?
So yes, an honour, but on the other hand, the modern role of godparent is less about renouncing evil and more about providing presents on birthdays and Christmas, perhaps going to the odd sports day and offering work experience in due course. Not a huge ask, especially if you only have one or two of the blighters, but trickier if you approach double figures. It becomes expensive, time consuming and — for me (with ten godchildren, like Elton) — yet another source of guilt because I never feel like I’m lavishing any of them with enough love and attention.
Hard to turn one down, though, especially when the new parents are perched in front of you, holding their little bundle, looking expectant. Their new baby is the most precious thing in the world (to them). How can you say no to without seeming like a monster?
You could say that you’re hugely flattered, you really are, but you feel like you already have a few godchildren and don’t believe you could devote the due amount of care to another one. Or that you’re an atheist. Or a Lib Dem.
If all else fails, there’s always the Hugh Grant line from About A Boy: ‘You know me,’ says his character, Will, when asked to be a godfather. ‘I'll drop her at her christening. I'll forget her birthdays until her 18th, when I'll take her out and get her drunk and possibly, let's face it, you know, try and shag her.’ That should do the trick nicely.
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