Happy Easter! Now, you may be expecting a list choc-full of various ridiculous chocolate eggs at various ridiculous price ranges but I say nay. Nay to that.
For you see, dear friends, Easter is about more than just the chocolate. It's about spending time with your family. It's about spending time outdoors as the weather begins to turn for the better. And, apparently, it's about toothbrushes, headphones and (gasp), gin! Enjoy.
I lied about the gin
Okay, so there isn't any actual gin in these eggs, but you can pretend with the personalised packaging which Vanilla Reindeer offer. Add a name, a picture and a message - they have the cute tagline picked out for you.
Personalised Small Easter Egg for £11.99, Personalised Six-Egg Box for £10.99, Personalised Large Easter Egg for £14.99, www.vanillareindeer.com.
NB: For anyone reading this, if I receive a "you're my hot cross bunny" egg, card or telegram this year, it will not go down well.
Would (Go)die for these adorable bunnies
Throughout my childhood, I conserved my supply of Easter eggs, sometimes right up until the next year and as you can imagine, they did not aged gracefully. Thus I learned a fateful lesson: Eat. Your. Chocolate. Immediately.
Which is exactly why when I managed to get hands on the latest easter offering from my favourite chocolate brand (they're like children, you'll never admit it but your bank statement shows where your priorities lie) I was chomping down on it before 9am. C'est la vie.
A returning favourite, Godiva's Easter Bunnies are joined on the shelves by their Mini Eggs in three wonderful flavours from praline to sweet coconut. I recommend grabbing the salted caramel before anyone else has a chance.
Godiva Bunny for £4 and Mini Eggs for £5, www.godivachocolates.co.uk.
It's not all about the chocolate 1.0
Easter eggs don't have to be cocoa-related. They can simply be eggs which one eats at Easter. I, for one, love a good morning egg and this adorable Sunshine egg cup and spoon set really takes the cute biscuit.
Colour Pop Sunshine Egg Cup and Spoon from Sophie Conran, £10.50, www.sophieconran.com.
You must be crackers
'Why?', you ask. It's a valid question and I don't have an answer for you. Happy Cheester.
Bunny beats
I sense I'm losing you here so let me just say - these are great quality and if your child ever wanders too far in the supermarket and cant hear you because they're listening to Mozart on high volume, at least you'll be able to spot them.
little rockerz Bunny Ear Headphones £24.99 from zagg.com/uk
Back to the true meaning of Easter
You're an adult and you want an Easter egg, but you know that if you bring that Cadbury's egg up to the counter you'll have to hastily mutter 'It's for my niece' so as not to be judged and get out of there as fast as possible. I sympathise, which is why I bring you this very adult and very abstract Easter egg from Lir.
Hand - Decorated Belgian Milk Chocolate Egg from Lir, £12, available in Tesco stores.
A match made in chocolate
Two of the world's most iconic brands have come together in the name of chocolate. Fabergé and The Ritz and chef John Williams MBE have created a unique three-course lunch menu which features the edible Eggs Fabergé dish, inspired by jeweller Peter Carl Fabergé’s iconic Mosaic Egg of 1914 (which took over a year to make). Hopefully this one wont take quite so long.
£295 per person Easter Lunch including wine pairings, www.theritzlondon.com
A savoury snack
No sweet tooth? No problem. Fortum & Mason have you covered with their Traditional Scotch Egg. Try pairing it with their Hot English Mustard for some extra zing.
To clean those cavities
You get the chocolate, your child gets the toothbrush. Fair deal? It actually is, because this nifty little brush allows your little darling to play games as they clean their teeth. Just make sure they're capable of not dropping the iPad in the sink first.
Playbrush Smart Sonic for £24.99, www.order.playbrush.com
If you purchased our entire list you would've spent £722.9. A paltry amount compared to most of our shopping lists, but really, how much can one really spend on chocolate?
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